Pet Peeve #41 – Slow Walkers

Trying to walk down the street, through the mall, down the aisle in the grocery store and having to stop and manoeuvre my way through this slow mess of traffic really winds me up. I’m not even just talking about the elderly who are unable to engage the thrusters. I’m talking about people my age who just wander about with their head in the clouds as if they’re lost. Surely there is some purpose for you to be here? There is something you want, yes? That’s why you’re in a store, correct? Surely there are better settings for an aimless walk? Because I know you’re not here for exercise, slow as you’re going you’re probably getting more unfit. And the ones on the sidewalk, I can kind of understand it. It’s a nice change of scenery, you’re out to soak it all in. But what about just shifting up a couple of gears and burning a few calories while you’re out? Two birds, people!

                This peeve escalates when the single slow walker becomes a group. And even more when this group travels in a straight line taking up the entire aisle or sidewalk. Is it intentional? Is this some kind of game you go out and play to frustrate others? Or are you like a school of fish, just unable to leave each other’s sides?

                This gets exponentially worse when it translates to your golf game. You can’t play bad, play slow, and walk slow! What is that about!? It’s Sunday! There’s obviously people behind you that want to get a sweet 18 in and you’ve ruined it by the third hole.

                There are some remote places where slow walking is accepted; around in circles in your ward at the funny farm, from the shore deeper and deeper into the ocean, off a cliff, or even through traffic.

                Happy walking!